We’ve all heard tales of nun porn on Kanopy, but as is the case with OCRA, no one has ever done a deep exploration of the video streaming service—Blog included. However, we recently attempted to at least scratch the surface of Kanopy’s offerings. Among Oscar-winning films and informative videos on architecture, we found a treasure trove of nun porn, yoga for the elderly, baby animals, and feet.
Check out Blog’s Weird Watchlist:
- Behind Convent Walls: The nun porn you’ve all been waiting for. This 1978 “erotic arthouse film” by director Walerian Borowzyck is “one of the most beautifully shot Nunsploitation films.”
- The Nuns: New York Vampires – Part 1: More nuns. This 2008 film depicts “curvaceous latex clad vampires…as the queen nun Tiffany Tarantula, an uber blond she-wolf…finally allows access to The Nun’s vault.”
- Two Orphan Vampires: Two teenage girls are blind, orphaned, and raised by nuns. They are also vampires. Surprisingly, they’re able to see and get around quite well throughout the movie despite their blindness.
- 6 Tips for Graphic Design Sizzle: No nuns, no porn. Just a 2005 informational film about graphic design using the “six tips plan,” and 2000s computer technology. Not only is this an informational video, but it also has a riveting story line! Kelsey and her friends learn how to make a poster for their charity drive with their school art/business teacher and some sizzling graphic design lessons.
- Second Chances: This PBS Series is actually quite similar to Two Orphan Vampires. Rescue center caregivers (much like the nuns) help wild baby animal orphans (like the orphan vampires) get back on their feet. The similarities stop there, as the Australian caregivers assist “baby Koala Danny, tiny wallaby Neil, and baby sloth Newbie” in getting the care they need. Simply adorable.
- The Complete Guide to BOTOX Injections: As we always say at Blog, prevention is key. You might not have wrinkles now, but you certainly will five years down the line. Take it upon yourself now to learn how to use Botox and prevent wrinkles! Plus, who doesn’t love watching 115 minutes of old white ladies getting stabbed in the face with needles?
- Foot and Leg Massage: Feeling cheap? Done with buying people gifts? In 7 minutes you can learn how to give a foot and leg massage so you’ll never have to buy another gift again!
- Yoga for the Elderly: “Yoga asanas, hand-picked and chosen by the Yoga Master…can be practiced by all age groups and can help in keeping the body and mind alert well into old age.” Not sure who the “Yoga Master” is, but hey, free yoga!